“Do not grow weary in doing good, for in due season you shall reap a harvest if you do not lose heart.” Galatians 6:9
This was our memory verse today in school. We are going through a character course that backs up characters with bible verses and gives practical mindsets on how to live it out.
As much as the curriculum is aimed at children kindergarten through third grade, it has served me many reminders of how to live out the characteristics I may be lacking in.
Today was about perseverance. Doing my best without giving up and seeing it through to the end.
Sometimes I trick myself by thinking that living from one day to the next is the same as persevering. Because there isn’t any quitting, so I must still be doing things well, right?
But this verse doing say do not grow weary “in begrudgingly plodding the necessary steps to get this thing over with,” it says to not grow weary “in doing good”!
As a person, I know there are natural seasons of growth when doing good comes easier. When the kids are happy, the sun is shining, the house is clean and there is fresh air coming in through the windows. It’s easy then!
And then there’s now: February.
The sky is gray more often than it is not. The house is a mess from all of the Christmas presents losing their sparkle and being thrown into the giant pile of regular toys. The air is cold outside and stale inside. And we are all cranky from lack of sunshine or things to look forward to.
It feels like the gray settles in and takes over everything.
They say that seasonal depression is caused by lack of sunlight. And while sunlight may help, it is a slow crawl back to sunny days where I live. (Although, this day – today – has actually brightened up considerably!)
I think there are a few other factors that contribute to depression at this time of year:
- Germs making us all the whole color wheel of sick, one after another.
- No big celebrations or holidays to plan for.
- The air in our houses isn’t fresh.
- We are non-hibernating mammals, yet we all hide in our dens for the winter.
- The pressure to perform at the same level as in other more energetic seasons has us feeling like we aren’t measuring up, even when we are still doing what needs to be done.
While I would love to rinse and repeat a perfect day all year, I also know that where I live very rarely has the same conditions outside for very long.
That going on a morning hike to start the day cannot happen when the sun doesn’t come up until mid-way through second breakfast.
Planning a vacation or celebration is fun when there’s a chance to see its fruit soon, but it’s almost dampening when my camper and my self are both winterized with no knowing when it will be easy to get out again.
And no matter the time of year, if my husband is not traveling, I cannot fling open the windows with abandon because of our allergens – green seasons for his, brown seasons for mine.
So I’m feeling a little stuck. A little despondent. A bit of a downer (but don’t call me Debbie!). And maybe like I’ve lost some heart.
So, prayerfully, what can be done?
I can notice the little things that fill my cup:
- The sunshine through a sun-catcher throwing rainbows onto my walls.
- The soft breathing of my sleeping boy on my lap, resting on a sick day.
- The way my kids light up when they tell me what they’ve been doing with their friends.
- How we all fit on our couch to watch hockey games together on Saturday nights.
- To enjoy the season where my kids all snuggle to sleep. (I’m still struggling to enjoy this, but I know it’ll be over before I’m ready for it!)
On Sunday, my pastor said “you can only change what you can change.” And while the subject matter can vary greatly, the principle stays the same.
I can’t change the weather, the germs, the length of a 24-hour day, or how much my kids need me at their young ages. Try as I might, those things are outside of my control.
So I’m choosing to change my mindset. It isn’t a hairpin turn, but a shift; just a few degrees of the wheel different and I’m heading in a better direction.
I’m also heading outside as soon as my sweet boy wakes up so I can enjoy the rare day of sunshine on a February day in Montana!